Twenty-Six.

Do what makes your soul happy.

 

I carried this quote with me through all of my 25th year. I made a promise to myself that I’d remember to do more of the things that I loved no matter if people didn’t understand them, or thought they were dumb. And that’s exactly what I did. I gushed over the release of Marvel movies; I bought way too many books, I freaked out over episodes of my favorite shows, I bought myself little gifts like my insane amount of Riverdale merchandise I now own and my golden girl tumbler glasses.

Being 25 I took the leap of going back to school. I was all alone in it, and I was terrified. Was it going to work? Was it going to be a mistake? Could I handle adding anything else to my plate?  But I did it anyways, and I’m loving it, and even when my days are so full I’m exhausted I look forward to class and considering I was such a crappy student in high school, getting such good grades now is incredibly empowering and I learned not to take it personally when only a few other friends were as proud of myself for doing it as I was.

Being 25, I opened myself up to people a little bit more than I had in the past (not without the upmost skepticism of course), but I also let go of some that I’d been too afraid that I’d put to much time into to just give up. I was able to reignite a friendship that I was missing dearly, caught up with one friend that no matter how many months that go by, one weekend and it’s like no time has ever passed.

Being 25 I finally realized just how much control I can have over my life. I’ve also realized that I work best on a set schedule, that is planned in advance, but I’m also one to change my plans at the drop of a hat and being a little of both is the best.

Being 25 I found an even stronger voice than I had before I turned 25 and as I roll into 26 I expect that voice to become even stronger. My political voice, my women empowerment voice, my mental awareness voice, my environmental voice, and so on. They’ve become so much apart of who I am, and I love that.

Three big time lessons that still ring true from my here’s to 25 post last year:

No matter how terrible something seems, no matter how down and out you feel, no matter how badly you hurt, no matter how certain you are that you’ll never stand back up. You will. You’ll stand back up, you will heal and you will be stronger because of it. Always keep fighting.

Never hide who you are. It took me a long time to grasp this. Love what you love, do what you love, and do whatever it is that makes your soul happy. If no one else understands it? Fuck ‘em. Always be you.

 It’s a quirky thing, how obsessed I am with the trees, the moon, everything. But I don’t think anything makes me feel as connected to the earth as being near the ocean. The Ocean is the most amazing place in the world. Call it a hippie thing, a tree hugger thing, it doesn’t matter because nature and all it’s beauty has the power to make or break my day, because I feel that connected to it, and I’m no longer seeing that as a “weird” thing.

Two things I hope to get better at by being a year older.

I tell myself every year, I’m going to step letting things get to me that I can’t control. I’m going to find a way to understand that not everyone thinks like I do, cares about things like I do, gets invested in things like I do. And there’s nothing wrong with the fact that I might care too much when others don’t care at all. While this is something I just can’t seem to master I’m making another promise to keep working on it at least.

I love reading. I love books. I have a million it seems. I definitely need more room to store them, and a whole other job to support my habit but what I don’t seem to have is enough time to read them. I currently have 10 books on my shelf that I still haven’t read, but couldn’t imagine not buying at the time. I bought another Nora Roberts book the other day to add to that, and Michelle Obamas new book, Becoming is number one on my list of must reads asap. If I make the time, set aside the time, I’d have the time. I just need to do that. Even if it’s only 20 minutes I need to dedicate more time to that.

And quite possibly the most important thing I can make sure to remind myself of is this quote here:

Screenshot-2018-06-26-13.28.09-862x443

 

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